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PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 10:20 pm 
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Templar Inner Circle
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Of course not, far too cliche.


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 2:36 pm 
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I got it! Less Lessman from WKRP......totally would rock for this.

I mean, talk about genre breaking. :grin:


.......I killed it with Less Lessman? :shock:


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 2:12 am 
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Alright, now I'm real sorry you guys, this was my bad. Due to school issues and how much sleep I'm getting and a bunch of little crap, the updates being pushed back to Sunday.


I'm real sorry and I feel like [censored] for delaying the story again after I skipped it last week. I cocked this up, and homework, school and lack of sleep and my god awful time management skills all kinda contributed to this. Seeing that this is probably stuff I'll encounter in the future, the day I update is officially moving to Sunday. This pretty much gives me Saturday evening and all of Sunday to work, which is really going to improve the size, and hopefully the quality of the updates I put out, as most of this I throw together in 1-3 hours, so all in all, it's a good thing for you and me both. Also, this will let me get a lot more sleep to do it, cause right now I'm working on around 6 hours per night on a good night.

Again, I'm very sorry for all of this, this has all been my fault, and as an apology I'm gonna try and make my Sunday update this week very special.

Thanks to the people who understand, and thanks to the people who don't because it means you like my work enough to be angry over it.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 7:31 am 
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We understand, Keldoth. Well, I understand. Though, if it just happens not be done by Sunday.

*Switchblade-extendo*

Something nasty might just happen while you sleep.


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 11:36 pm 
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Heh, don't worry about it, Kel. Life happens. It seems to me that it happens a lot more to people in school than to everyone else. :)


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 31, 2008 11:35 pm 
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Shexy time!
Keldoth get's off his fat [censored] and writes noaw, kthxbye!
Note to self, main character's name is Kenadri.
----------------------------

We approached the silent, dark town on the cold road. On either side, the dark wood of trees had been beaten back, and kept there by curved, twisting runes on the sides of the road, a recent trick of the industrious times, at least to my memory.

Treeal didn't start as a dead town, or even one fated to be one. It was booming from it's start, thanks to gold found during the digging of the Town's well. People flocked from all over to come to the town. The streets were packed with the housing, businesses, and entertainment industry packed the streets, and the old lives that lived there were almost palpable.

But the town died. Most don't know why. After one year, the people within just.... drifted off. Little bit at a time, people either found reasons, or had none and just walked out. Year by year, till it was empty. No one came back. People didn't even loot the place.

She moved in. People didn't understand what that meant. People don't understand what She is. But the feel what surrounds her.

I could feel it now. A niggling sense of unease and discomfort surrounded it, like someone was watching you, not just seeing you, but watching you. Studying you. Understanding everything about you, seeing through you.

It is because She is.

We approached the center of town, where She nows lives. It was little over a shack, the wood rotten and decaying, a sheet over the doorway, and under which shone the light and heat of a fire within. John and myself stepped into the room, to see within wooden floors, and a room little more than a fireplace and a white mattress on the floor, made, with a green sheet. Sitting within was a girl, looking now halfway into her 20's, looking into the the fire. Her head turned as we entered, showing her pretty features of Her pale skin, her snow white hair coming down halfway down her back. Her larges eyes showed irises as white as her hair.

Faster than most people would think possible of a girl, she proceeded to charge me. John jumped back, his hand going for his sword. He had no time to get it out before my arms were trapped by this pale girl in a big hug.

I smiled. She was one of the few old friends I have. "Glad to see you are still here," I said as she buried her head into my chest.

Her voice was cool, glad, and most of all, knowing. "I was worried about the end of your story. You were gone 40 years from the book." she realized me and sat to the left of the room, near the fire. I sat across from her. She looked cold, as she always did, in a dark red skirt that fell just about her knee, a black long coat around her over a soft white tunic. Around her neck, she wore a wore a white scarf. I walked over a sat next to her, nearly 2 and a half feet taller than her.

John, a little confused, sat on the bed and waited.


"So Anabell, I'm sorry to say, this isn't just personal, there is business to be done." She looked a little sad, hugging her knees against the cold in the airy house. A flicker of my will set the fire into a roaring flame, the room warming to a comfortable state, and Anabell relaxing visibly. "Not that seeing you again was a disappointment."

She smiled again. "I understand. I know know there are things you must do, a great many things. I'm willing to give whatever help I can. Besides, I still owe you for my name.... and.. other things from long ago." Her eyes looked back to a time long ago."

I remembered those times too. "I'm afraid I ask quiet a bit, and I do not wish to call on debts of the past."

John stood up, removed a dark pouch for his belt that jingled with coin and threw it down in front of her. "This is all we have. I hope it would be enough, and we have little else to offer."

She looked up to him, confused. "It is not enough. One will never have enough rocks for a stream."

His eyes narrowed. His mind worked through it, through the logic of the phrase. "Then what do you ask?"

I held up a hand, stopping his tongue. "I come with a new story. A tale of a small village in the southern mountains.....

-----------

A small boy sat on the porch of his home, his elbows on his knees, waiting. The sun beat down on the town like a rain of fire.
That's what he did.
He waited.

A woman walked from the house. His mother, her tan skin shining in the sun's waning light. She told him to come inside for dinner, and he followed her into the house. They sat in silence, poor grade meat was consumed. "Timmy... dad's coming to home today." She smiled and looked at the boy with hope, dressed all in black, necklace to the dark gods in his neck.

The cliched teen anger was damn near a fog.

"I was dad was dead." he said simply. As it did all the time, silence reigned in the house.

He walked into his room, to his alter to the things that go bump in the night and said his nightly pray to them, no meaning or intent behind them. A prayer for the sake of a prayer and little else.

This night, however, the angel Lacieses watched this night. Lacieses was tired of his shadow of worship to the gods. He was not a man touched by the code, he would never amount to much, even less to the dark gods.

Lac's black wings bore him across the night, his eyes scanning the town below. He saw a man walking to the house, not a block away, a spring in his step.

Lacieses dove towards him, bringing his spear ready.
"Who are you?" asked the man, his eyes alight with fright.
"Desire" Replied the angel, as his spear bit the flesh of the man's neck, taking spilling his blood to the ground. A cry escaped his lips.

The boy rushed from the house at the cry, the only one in town to hear it, on Lacieses's will.

Horror touched every part of the boy. He recoiled in horror at the sight. "Who are you?" he asked the dark figure.

"I'm the angel desire," smiled the angel, "and I know you," frost came to his features." every night I hear your prayers. Every night I hear you wishes to be more than what you are. Just a boy, just a child, for you entire life. Well now I'll give you a glimpse of what you desire so."

He threw the boy the spear. People, woken by nothing but the song of the dark, saw the boy and his father, but not the angel. The boy watched the angel stalk into the night, seeing his own demise. He was a murder now, because he knew that Laciese had guided him, or so it was to everyone else. He got his glimpse of what it was like to be one of use as he hung from the Town's highest tree.

----------

"You always bring me the prettiest stories." She was sitting up now, leaning forward, Her eyes narrowed in interest. "The payment is done, what do you wish in return?"

"Tell me... of my empire."





We walked out of the town in dead night. John has question in his eyes.

"Well?" I asked, in earnest curious of his pondering.

"What did she mean when she talked about the 'times you've shared?'" His tone made it obvious that he understood, but I clarified anyway.

"Anabell and myself have been... a great many things to each other." I thought fondly of times passed long ago.

It was left at that as we continued onward, my list of things that needed doing even greater than I thought before.


-------------
Now, I tell you what, I've been in my business a long time, and I've been hired or met my contractors in dozens of ways, many of them strange. Letter drops, shadowy corridors, messages to meet somewhere found in the corpse. None of these seemed to surprise my partner.

This one did.

Then again, perhaps anyone would be surprised if a man barged into a nobleman's room, burned your current employer to ash, then gave you work to do.

"............ You killed my last employer," Aaron said, dressed in his plate mail, face hidden, threat in his voice.

"Yes," said the cloaked figure. "And I'm your employer now."

"But you cost me money. You'd better pay me-"

"He's a nobleman. Check under his mattress."




Alright, that's it for the night.
Big [censored] update, pretty much as big or bigger than my first post. My headaches at the moment, so lore will be done in the morning most likely.


Alright, finally, updated!
Kilroy is not gonna cave my face in with a cement block, grab my brain, bring it to Spiffy and have him throw it in a machine that extracts my creative juices till my brain is a withered husk and my story is done! Plus, two more people at least started being added.
Woo ~<3!

Next week, this time, I'll keep on it.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 5:19 pm 
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Templar GrandMaster
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Well, I don't know about other people, but I'm still liking it.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 5:21 pm 
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Templar Inner Circle

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After your hiatus, I forgot what the story was about ^_^;;

Guess I'll go re-read it.



EDIT: Aside from a few typos, good. Keep it up!


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2008 3:39 pm 
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Grand Templar
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Holy crap! How was I able to miss the update for so long?!

As allways, great work Keldoth. Loving the lenght of this update. And I'm just going to have to quote Fooby here. Not really, but you get what I'm saying.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2008 2:28 am 
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Grand Templar
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Sithil wrote:
Holy crap! How was I able to miss the update for so long?!



well, I know my answer to that question. Procrastination 8)

good update by the way =^.^=


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 05, 2008 1:04 pm 
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Location: The people in the white lab coats won't tell me.
Very nice. I'm going to assume that the partner that never gets surprised is Eric, eh?

'Cause you said he'd be in this one.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 05, 2008 1:06 pm 
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Templar Inner Circle
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That tinsey bit at the end was told from Eric's perspective.


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PostPosted: Fri Sep 05, 2008 8:42 pm 
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nice, nice...


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 9:45 pm 
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Templar Inner Circle
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Location: Five miles into nothing, sitting in a Dennies
Finally I get my sorry [censored] to writing. The lack of updates was due to an illness followed by the 2,000 [censored] tons of make up work and big projects that I was forced to take as a supsitory.

But now, I'm updating, along with a preview for a story I'm gonna start up writing as well.

I cocked an eyebrow at him. I didn't say anything, after all I need both my face and flesh intact to do business, neither of which he seemed to have much care about, judging by the pile of ash that had been spread about the room after his foot bumped it.

Aaron, his hand on his sword, slowly moved to the man's bed, never taking his eyes off the man. He drew his [censored] sword from his hip, it's dull gray blade plain, about 3 1/2 feet long, it's handle wrapped in simple brown worn cloth. He poked under the mattress and drew it up.

Underneath sparkled and shimmered, coins and jewels of red, fine silk and ivory, wealth of all kinds. Easily enough to pay us off 100 times over.

We both sat there dumbstruck at the fortune and at the cloaked man.

"What?" he said, a smile in his tone. "He was a nobleman. They don't believe in silly commoner things like 'banks' or 'vaults'. They're always pretentious enough to assume it's safe in it's little hidey spot that no one knows about. Would probably work too, if they all didn't use the same spot."

Aaron let out a soft chuckle, crossed his lean, toned arms covered in plain steel plate mail that covered his body, chain and leather filling gaps, his head in a helm where no part of his face could be seen.

I would have waited too, but I was a little busy shoveling riches into a few inter dimensional bags to keep it all nice, safe, and light.

"Well?" said Aaron, after a time, "You have work?" He still sounded amused.


"Why yes, yes I do. You're a hunter are you not? Well, then hunt. Find people for me. Tell me where they are. Do not kill them, their lives are mine."

"You do realize people move around right? I find them and by the time I'm back there are already gone. What then?" Aaron asked cautiously.

His head fell back a moment, a slight breath, a wave of his hands that as they moved trailed black feathers, the sound of wings, and in his palm sat a crow.

It was an utterly normal crow, blue black feathers, beak and all, except for it's eyes, which though shaped the same, had the colors and iris of the man before them.

"That will not be a problem. Just lead Jagar to them. He is my eyes and ears, you need just find them, and he will do it from there. Besides, blade whore, why do you care as long as your payed?" His and cocked his head, a smile showing his teeth.

"Ha! Say what you will of me, as long as I'm payed. My usual fees are by head, but that will not work so well for this, now will it?"

The man let out a cackle. "I'm afraid if you brought me there heads, I'd be forced to take yours. No, I offer power. I know you hate those with magic. Nice it would be, if some how all the little tricks they used to protect themselves simply.... didn't?"

Aaron got serious at that. "What... are you offering?"

"I have a plan to plan, what I do know is I can get you Decilj."

I of course, had no idea what was going on. I realize it's been awhile, but I was still shoveling. It was a big pile, plus, I was mulling over all the line's I'd get to use now. How can I sleep at night? On piles of money! Eeee I'm so happy.

"How do I know you're good for it?" Aaron's eyes narrowed beneath hsi helmet. "It's in the Sanctum, is it not?"

"Why yes, yes it is. As are many of my things. I can pick it up on the way. Deal?"

"Deal."


-----------------------------

Alright, that's it for the night for that.


Now for the preview.

A little back story, I recently took up 40k, and though I've yet to do anything playing wise, I fell in love with the fluff for the Black Templar, and plus in my other story, there's very little action, so I wanted to balance it out. So this is about something I made up, which I call the Crusade of the Red Dawn. It'll be explianed later.


For all the fans, if I get things wrong about races, I apologize, I only have the Space Marine and Black Templar codex, so yeah.


---------------------------
The Crusade of the Red Dawn
Chapter 1:

"He's supposed to be the best squad leader out there."

"Yeah, and basic was the easy."

"I here it from everyone."

The two Acolytes entered the small room, seats with straps surrounding the central column of the small pentagonal one, with its oldy arching walls. They sat and strapped themselves in, bolters at their sides, battle brothers next to them.

The straps were all filled but one, and into the room walked another black clad figure.

Veteran Sergeant Antalish entered the room. He scanned the room. 5 Initiates in there black power armor, 5 Acolytes in there simple armor.

"You've been briefed on what we do here today. To the new Acolytes here, you will learn the ways of war." He said, his voice deep, reverberating through the room.

With that, the room rocked, and the wind screamed as the drop pod feel to the ground, the air heating the walls to nearly orange bright. The impact shake the pod, and the walls fell away. The soldiers descended out, and a single man ran up to the captain, a guardsman dressed in the green uniform of this word, lasgun falling out of his hands, he gripped the captain and shouted "They're breaking through! Ohlordohlord, nothing can stop them, they just tore through the tank line! I... I ca"

The man took off running, the opposite to the battle. The captain turned, drew his bolt pistol, and fired.

The shot took the man mid back, cleaved through his armor, and left him there, lying on the ground not ten yards away, bleeding.


"Lesson 1. There is no retreat."


-----------------------
Alright, that's it. Not too happy with the preview, but oh well.


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PostPosted: Sun Sep 28, 2008 10:02 pm 
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Grand Templar
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Location: The people in the white lab coats won't tell me.
EXCELLENT!

Eric's a bit of a loon, you got him just right. :mrgreen:

I DEMAND A NEW INSTALLMENT EVENTUALLY! >: |


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